We always try to brush off minor worries with a cheery - and brave if a little trepidatious - "what's the worst that can happen?". Dear Traveller, one of the worst things that can happen whilst being away in the van is finding that also sharing the journey, sitting grinning inanely out of the windscreen, is a diarrhoea and vomiting bug. Murderous! Especially if there are no toilets nearby!! See, we have an agreement....no solids in the van toilet. Not that diarrhoea is solid but....you get the idea. How many holes can one dig without leaving the area looking like a mole army battleground? A toxic mole army battleground at that. The dreaded D/V struck us both whilst we were enjoying a peaceful weekend in the Suffolk countryside in an orderly and pristine campsite. Just making it outside at dark-o-clock to throw up right outside the van door is not conducive to a romantic break. Nor does it endear one to one's fellow field-sharers. Then there is the hurried trot (sorry!) to the camp toilet block ....again and again. Probably leaving a well-worn trail in the camp site's beautifully manicured grass. Never mind what we left in the impossibly clean facilities. Well....we came home. Having invented a new high number on the Bristol Stool chart, we did not want to share our new found infamy.